Success: A State of Mind

Metaphysical, Occupational

Going after one’s dream is a difficult journey, taken by the brave. Filled with obstacles and naysayers, doubt will always surround your vision. It takes mental strength to persevere and stick with your passion. Fortunately, we are in the right place and time to make our goals happen.

“Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success.”

American psychologist Joyce Brothers 1927-2013.

When we were children and asked what we wanted to do when we grew up, we all had an answer. Even if it isn’t something that interests you now, you had a dream and a passion. As we grow and transition into adulthood, our dreams slowly get placed on the back burner while we take care of everyday priorities.

Most of us still try to be who we want to be, achieving what we’ve always imagined we could. It just gets harder to do so. Over the years and layers of responsibility, our perception of dreams changes from being the future to unrealistic.

Use the Law of Attraction

The Law of Attraction is the theory that your thoughts and desires will eventually turn to reality. If you think positive thoughts about your goals, you will in turn be guided to find the ways to achieve them. If you think negatively about your aspiration, they won’t come to life the way you want them to.

“A large part of the Law of Attraction is learning how to be an open, happy person who vibrates on a high frequency and induces a positive response in others. The way in which we spread good attitudes toward other people and attract kindness, generosity and success can be partly explained with reference to mirror neurons—neurons that ‘mirror’ the behavior we observe.”

6 Science Facts That Prove That The Law Of Attraction Exists By Katherine Hurst

Throughout history, this notion has been deemed true. What goes around comes around, you get what you put our there, etc. Here are some tips to help in reframing your successful mindset.

  • Set Realistic Goals: We, as people, can get carried away with our extravagant goals. I’m going to lose 30lbs, I’m going to write a book. I’m going to make six figures. Dreaming big keeps us motivated because we love to fantasize. To make it reality, we need to outline and take reasonable steps to reach our large dreams.
  • Remain Positive: We’re all afraid of getting our hopes up only for out deepest desires to be denied by the world. Keeping a realistic perspective doesn’t mean sacrificing hope. Put what you want out there in the world, and you will received it.
  • Make Time for Yourself: Going after what you want in life can be time consuming and demand lots of attention. You have to figure out juggling this while dealing with all the other joys life has to offer. Don’t forget to take a moment for yourself, a day or weekend, we all need to take a break once in a while.
  • Find Your Support Network: Metaphysical poet, John Donne (1572-1631) said, “No man is an island entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main.” Whether it’s family or friends, we all have someone who loves and supports us. Cherish and thank them every so often.

What defines success: money, love, fame? Ultimately, success is what you envision your life to be. It’s about being who you want to be and go after what matters most to you. Find your success and keep working for it.

Positive Thinking with Self Awareness

Health

The power of the mind is both an exhilarating and terrifying thing. Some people enjoy their inner monologue, often getting lost in thought. Others prefer to keep themselves busy with tangible tasks because they don’t want to face what they’re thinking. The mind can take a person down dark paths. One negative thought can lead to another, traveling down a rapid spiral that is difficult to get out of. Finding a way to maintain optimism may seem impossible and insincere.

The average person has about 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day. Of those, 80%  are negative and 95% are exactly the same repetitive thoughts as the day before.

80 % of Thoughts Are Negative…95 % are repetitive By Faith Hope & Psychology 

The Optimist, Pessimist, and Realist

An optimist is someone who is hopeful, even if the chances of success are stacked against them, some would consider these people, “dreamers.” Let’s give an example about asking for a promotion, the optimist would say, “I’ll definitely get a raise.”

A pessimist is someone who believes that the worst will happen in any situation, these people are sometimes called, “downers.” If a pessimist is going in for the same promotion, they’d say, “They’re not going to give me a raise.”

A realist is someone who recognize as situation for what it is, finding the best solution, they tend to rely on data and facts to make decisions. When a realist asks for a promotion, they’d say, “I’ll show them my performance report and that’ll convince them.”

A realist can also combine their traits with an optimist or pessimist. An optimistic realist is someone who prepares success logically, but still wishes for the best. A pessimistic realist will go into success with all the same preparations and still think the worst will happen.

While it’s necessary to look situations rationally, there is always room for positivity. The Law of Attraction is the idea that you get what you put out there . “If you focus on positive thoughts and have goals that you aim to achieve you will find a way to achieve them with massive action.” The difficult part is in believing that this could be true. When I first started hearing this notion, I thought it was dull and cheesy. It was only until years later, in my adult life, did I start to implement this practice.

Although we’ve been told this idea over again, why is it that there are so many reminders to have a positive outlook on things? Because the daily stress of our lives bring us down and we let them. As we aim to achieve more in our age, the more complex and heavy our responsibilities become. Day after day, it wears down on a person, slowly chipping away at the light inside, the one that struggles to maintain lit.

Self awareness is the key to combating negativity.

Being self aware means taking responsibility for your actions, understanding you’re not perfect, and that you’re ultimately in charge of who you are. It’s a process that needs to be practiced daily. When a person is self aware, they aren’t upset at the world around them or convinced that there is only the worst to come. A person who is self aware gains control of their life, because they don’t hold on to negativity.

Instead of mindlessly browsing social media, watching TV or playing games (which I’m guilty of too), take a moment to reflect, even if it’s just for ten minutes. Meditate, contemplate, breathe, and learn from your own actions.

[Self awareness] requires a deep understanding of your past and current self. Experiences shape how we see the world. So, we have to reflect on how the world has shaped us. 

Know Thyself: How to Develop Self-Awareness By Bill George


Putting out positive energy is just as powerful as negative energy. People who practice self awareness find ways to be more positive in their lives, because like realists, they learn from past events and apply them to situations in the future. One can still be optimistic while being realistic. In reframing your personal outlook on situations and opportunities, you might find your goals and dreams fall into place. Consider you who are, who you want to be, and what you want to achieve. It’s always the right time to start.

The Relationship’s Emotional Rock

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Love relies on compromise and nurture. Through the lifetime of any relationship, there’s give and take between the parties involved romantically. Emotions are a touchy subject, particularly between two people. One person may feel like they’re putting in all the effort, supporting their partner emotionally. The other may feel like the connection is lost all together.

Over time, two people can disconnect because they feel the love and attachment fades within a marriage or relationship. We are human. We feel emotion. Still, so many of us ignore that part of ourselves, and in turn, disregard it in others. Romance is more than lust and attraction, it’s support and intimacy, emotionally and physically. Here are a few tips to emotional stability within relationships:

The important thing is that you gently communicate your feelings, so you both know where you stand and so you can figure out how best to help one another deal with the situation.

Emotionally Supporting Your Partner by Barton Goldsmith Ph.D.
  1. Touch Each Other: People need human touch, and in certain circumstances, a loving embrace works better to communicate than words. When your partner is upset and frustrated, even touching their hand or arm could put them at ease.
  2. Communicate and Listen: Both men and women want to be heard. We all want to express ourselves and have our feelings validated. It’s hard to remember, as a partner, that we don’t have to give our opinion in every situation, rather we should provide our support in whatever our loved ones are going through.
  3. Deal with Stress Together: Stress is a catalyst for negative emotions. When one thing goes wrong, so does everything else, as it would seem. This takes a toll on everyone involved and is completely unavoidable. The best way to handle it is together, with open lines of communication and compassion.
  4. Take Care of Yourself: In a relationship, both parties have to work on fixing each other’s issues together. Yet, sometimes we get so involved with helping those around us, we forget to take care of our needs. Love and partnership helps in making yourself a better person, but self-care is still necessary for long term mental health.
  5. Emotions are Handled Differently: Depending on how a person was raised and their genetic make-up, humans all express themselves in their own ways. As you spend more time with someone, you’ll notice what their ticks are, based on what they’re feeling. Through observation before action, a person can infer a situation by a person’s body language.

Men release less Oxycontin than women when they are stressed, meaning they have a stronger reaction from both cortisol and epinephrine. [Women nurture] those around them in an effort to both protect themselves and their young. Men [are] more likely to have the “fight or flight” response when it comes to stress – either repressing their emotions and trying to escape the situation, or fighting back.

HOW TO HANDLE YOUR PARTNER’S STRESS Posted by: Team Tony

We are flawed, imperfect beings with irrational emotions, and intellectual minds. The emotional rock in a relationship is handed back and forth. Sometimes, you’ll be the one that needs a shoulder to lean on. Other times, you’ll be the shoulder that is leaned upon. Beyond physical pleasure, the joy and beauty in being with another person is having someone to go through it all, together.